As a Mother I Never Thought I Would...

 I recently met with a friend of mine who has not had children yet. She is in the process of buying a house with her partner and is looking towards her future with excitement. As she imagines what her life as a wife and mother will be like I am sure she has many pre conceived ideas. If they are anything like mine were, most of them are probably wrong!

This got me thinking about the pre-mother me, all of the things I naively thought about motherhood and what sort of mother I thought I would be. In fact I had some very strong opinions about how I would parent and quite frankly I have probably made mistakes on all of them.

So as part of my blog I am going to outline a total of 5 things I never thought I would do as a mother. Today’s pre-mother me ideal is…

Always follow though

We are at the park. I’m chatting with my friends and the children are playing nicely burning off some energy. Bliss! It doesn't take long though for someone to have a tantrum. I used to watch other mothers use the threat “If you don’t behave we are going home” but then they would stay. The “pre mother me” was very judgemental about this. If you make a threat/promise it must be followed through at all times to show the children that you mean business, that there are consequences to their actions. Otherwise they will think they can walk all over you. Well yes I used to think this and to be honest I still agree with every word. Reality however means that threats come out of my mouth that I have no intention of keeping, in the vague hope they will have some sort of affect.  The “we will go home” is a classic but there are many more.  We all do it, after all Santa Clause is the ultimate empty threat. No matter how naughty my 3 year old was on Christmas Eve, Santa was always going to come to our house. Even though I told her countless times that Santa only goes to houses with good boys and girls who go to bed on time!

Next week I will think about another “pre-mother me” ideal; “Because I said so!”  

What to write?

When it was suggested I start my own blog I was puzzled, a little overwhelmed and I must admit: scared.  After all, who would want to read what I have to say?

So here is a little bit about me to help you decide if you may be interested in my ramblings…

I am just a normal British girl (can I still call myself a girl at 30?) I am married with two beautiful girls aged 3 years and 8 months.  I used to be a teacher, a play worker, a youth worker and a key worker at a comprehensive school. Currently though I am a freelance writer, aspiring author and of course a mother, wife and house maker!

I don’t vote, not because I don’t care about politics, I do. I just don’t care for the politicians. I have felt let down by broken promises and unwise, ill informed choices. I do definitely sit on the left side of the fence. In my younger days I was known to take part in protests – this though is a topic for another blog!

I am not religious; I never have been although I did go to a catholic school. For a long time I would have described myself as an atheist. However I will say, with age, the coming of motherhood and the influence of some very special people, I may not see life and death in such black and white terms any more. Although I don’t know how grey things really are.

One thing I know for sure is that I believe in life and living it with the biggest smile you can muster. What you give to life you will get back. Having a positive attitude about yourself and those around you (even those that you really want to hate!) will result in positive outcomes in your own life. I try to reflect these beliefs in my writing. I feel strongly that we need to take more time to teach children about finding happiness, about being truly grateful and embracing life with positivity. My children’s books all aim carry these messages.

So why would anyone want to read about what I have to say? Well I guess maybe because I hope to reflect what other normal people like me may think. I know for a fact that not everyone will agree with me, particularly those of you that sit on the right side of the proverbial political fence! But that’s Ok, life is about sharing. I will listen to what others have to say, this wasn't always my biggest strength, just ask my mother! But I am trying!

So what to expect from my blog… well to be honest I am learning as I go. But expect updates on my new writing career and observations about topical subjects such as education and those that affect families’ children and young people. Or simply expect the ramblings of a normal 30 year old girl!

Look out for Lisa Barry’s new fun rhyming books aimed at children aged 2 – 7. My New Space Bike and Stanley Brown Learns to Read. They will be available soon on Amazon.